14dpo...where is AF?

I've been testing with the crappy cheapies all weekend, and stupid evap lines aside, all BFNs. I hauled out the big guns and used a FRER today, but in the 3 minutes I stared at before racing off to work because I was late, it was also negative. I keep going to the bathroom because I'm positive that AF is here...but nothing. I had cramps at 10dpo and thought she'd be here by Wednesday.

We have to go to brunch with some of R's friends from high school. I really like them, but 4 of them are BFFs forever and one has just announced her pregnancy. I'm not sure I can sit through them fawning over her when AF has just arrived.

And on the topic of those currently KU, my one SIL has figured out we are having trouble. Not the one that is KU, thank God, but the one I like the best. She went to R and asked if I would be upset if she asked me to help plan the baby shower. R said she should go ahead and give me the opportunity to decide for myself. Why he said that I have no idea. I wouldn't want to help plan a baby shower if I wasn't infertile. I hate those things. Anyway, May 22nd is the next date I get to dread. Also, who invites 40+ people to a baby shower? AW much?

I *think* we have an a decision.

Of course I will need to discuss it with R tonight, but the coordinator called me back (naturally I was away from my desk) and left a message saying that we had an additional 10k of medication coverage, and that the sperm freeze was also covered...so that would leave us with co-pays and maybe anesthesia. So now the next decision whether or not to squeeze in one more natural cycle before BCPs.

updates on IVF

We found out that I can get on R's insurance at any time, which is great news. We probably couldn't get it worked out for May since the insurance does need 30 days advance notification, but we were looking at cycling June 11th. I am not real thrilled with cycling in the summer, or having a potential BFN within weeks of SILs due date, but it is what it is.

I talked to our IVF coordinator last week and she confirmed that we also get great medication coverage. Today R checked with his company about lifetime max coverage....and it is only 10k. If this max includes medication we won't even come close to the cost of one IVF cycle, not to mention we are SOL if it fails. So I have another call into the coordinator. I am hoping that meds are covered separately. I did some math using the highest med estimate (7,500).
Total cost including everything for one regular IVF is 19,975.
Minus 10k leaves us with 9,975.
If meds are covered separately we have 2,475 to pay OOP plus co-pays

My other thought is paying OOP for the half-price cycle and seeing if we could use the coverage for just meds. I'm not sure if this would be allowed but here is that break down.
Total cost for everything and meds for first IVF is 14, 200.
If meds can be covered we are left with 6, 700.

If meds aren't covered seperately and option #2 is available, clearly that is the better deal. Even if they are, about 4k extra would get us two IVF cycles plus any FETs from the first cycle. So.... backup plans of FETs and IVF#2 included in 7k, or just one with 2-10k. This is so frustrating. And I'm sure the stress of this is really helping my chances in this 2ww.

Lining check.

I requested a monitoring appointment to see what my lining would do on its own, since it has been on the thin side during medicated cycles. I was afraid it would be too thin to ever conceive on our own, but it is about the same. The nurse took a few measurements between 6-7mm. I am on cd16 and I have one nice follie on the left at about 19mm. They ended up doing b/w as well, but I'm not sure if I'll get the results. Hopefully I will ovulate earlier than usual, otherwise that follie will be too big by cd21ish.

I haven't done much this cycle on the TTC front. I've remembered to drink green tea once. I haven't bothered with POM juice at all, and I've enjoyed caffeinated beverages whenever I feel like it. I did start taking FertileCM supplements and so far it seems to be working really well.

In other news, I'm on day 2 of the South Beach diet. I never thought a diet could be stressful because you have to eat. I rarely eat breakfast and I'm not a snacker, so I feel like my whole life revolves around food now. Last night after I cooked dinner, I had to cook chicken for today's lunch and make sure all my food and snacks was packaged up for work today. I guess it is good mom practice. So far (with the unwanted help of a horrible virus I had last week) I'm down about 4-5lbs from my medicated cycle weight.

RE/IVF consult

We went over everything and if I chose to do IVF now I would start BCPs in mid-April and begin cycling May 7. Our success rates would be 55-60% with a single embryo transfer. I am a great candidate for the egg freezing study and I'd get the cycle at half price. Any subsequents FETs would be included in that cost. That is pretty much where the good new stops.

Here is the cost breakdown for the half-price IVF (full price is 11, 550.oo)
IVF cycle (including consults, monitoring, retrieval, transfer, etc) = $5, 775
Anesthesia = $650
Semen freeze (for emergency backup) = $275
Meds = $4, 500 -7,500

The meds part was what we were not expecting. I had been under the impression that my insurance would cover at least some of it, but that is very unlikely. There is a chance that R's insurance has IVF coverage, but we aren't sure how much or when I could get on his plan since open enrollment is normally in October. So he is going to try to get exact answers in the next two weeks.